Before the Virus Takes Hold
by bettertohaveloved
Summary: Roger becomes sick and leaves Mark to question himself. Is it too late to tell Roger how he feels? Crappy summary but nice story. Fluff. Oneshot. the works.


It was just after a new gig Roger just played and it went great as usual. His rock-and-roll voice wowed the crowd as it always did, but lately Roger hasn't been enjoying the attention as much as he used to.

Everyone was out celebrating at a small cafe, blowing some of the money they made not twenty minutes ago. The huge group of friends put all the tables together because a booth just doesn't cut it for Maureen, Joanne, Collins, Mark, Mimi, Roger plus some other friends and fans.  
"A toast!" announced Mimi, standing on her chair, drink in hand, "To the next rock star- and my boyfriend... Roger Davis!" Everyone clapped as Roger smiled and looked down sheepishly.  
"Can you believe her?" he asked to his best friend Mark who was sitting on his other side. Mark simply smiled and shrugged.  
"Well, you did do excellent." He said. Mark was always a little jealous of Roger. Roger was always just so cool and good at everything. Not to mention he could go out with anyone he wanted. Mark's relationships never seemed to last long. But Roger never bragged about himself. They've been best friends since their senior year of high school when Roger got Mark out of a locker some bigger guys stuffed him in, mistaking him for a freshman.

_FLASHBACK_

"And don't forget it, you little fucker!" one of the bigger seniors barked as he shoved Mark into a locker and closed the door. They only picked on him because he was so small and vulnerable. Mark never actually _did_ anything to offend them.  
"Hey! Guys! That's not funny! Let me out of here!" yelled Mark as heard the laughter and footsteps drift down the hall.  
"Is anyone there? Hello?" Mark yelled pathetically. Of course there was no one there. It was right after school. Mark was running late along with those guys. Everyone would be on the bus by now and he would have to stay there all fucking night. He let out an exasperated sigh. This has happened before, but it got old real fast.  
After about a half hour of Mark sitting in darkness wondering how he was going to explain this to his parents and convince them _not_ to call the school, he heard footsteps coming near him. Before he could say something the locker opened and another kid with dirty blond hair opened the door.  
"HOLY SHIT!!!" the kid screamed as he saw Mark in his locker.  
"Surprise." Mark said under his breath, embarrassed as all hell.  
"What the fuck are you doing in my locker??" the kid screamed.  
"Oh, I just hide in peoples lockers for the hell of it." said Mark, fed up with the way people treated him, "it's a hobby."  
"Sorry, man. Did those assholes put you in there?" The kid said, offering Mark a hand up.  
"Yeah."  
"Well, sorry, 'bout freaking out like that. I'm Roger."  
"Mark. Your in my biology class."  
"Oh yeah. I just got out of extra help- I suck at Bio."  
"I could help you out sometime if you needed it." offered Mark, overjoyed that Roger Davis, one of the most popular kids at school was being nice to him.  
"Yeah, sure. Thanks. Are you okay? Do you want me to talk to those guys for you?"

The next day at school, the guys that put Mark in the locker came in with black eyes. From then on, Mark and Roger were inseparable.

-------* end of flashback*-------

"Hey Roger, remember when we first met?" Mark asked  
"Yeah... what does that have to to with anything?" Roger asked amused.  
"Nothing, just... remembering." Roger laughed  
"Let's get outta here."

------THE NEXT DAY------

The next day passed without much to report. Collins was applying for a teaching job, Maureen and Joanne were out together, Mimi was working at her new job- a waitress, Roger was out for a walk and Mark was in his apartment, alone, as he so often was.

Mark seemed to be on his own a lot these days, what with Joanne and Maureen's relationship finally holding steady, Collins, engulfed in his work, trying to spread the word of AIDS and actual reality and, of course, Roger and Mimi spending every waking moment together. For some reason, Mark was extremely jealous, every time he saw them together. Sometimes he would wonder what it would be like in Mimi's place, holding hands with Roger. That didn't mean he liked Roger in that way though, does it? Even though Mark often felt that Roger deserves someone better, someone who knew him and how to handle his outbursts. Someone like him...

The day shifted into evening and Mark began to worry about where Roger was. He only went for a walk. Had he met up with Mimi? Why wasn't he back?  
Mark carried his bike down the stairs to go look for him. Maybe they could go out to eat or something. Just the two of them.

As Mark rode down the darkening streets, he heard violent coughing sounds in an ally. Mark dismounted his bike and carefully approached.  
"Hello?"  
A figure was on the ground hunched over in a fettle position and had and had another coughing fit. Mark went over and turned the man to face up.  
"Oh, God." Marks heart stopped beating for a moment, "Roger."  
"Mark?" Roger said weakly, a stream of blood running down the corner of his mouth.  
"Shh." Mark said and struggled to pick Roger up, "we have to get you to the hospital. Just rest."  
Mark walked out towards the street, Roger in his arms, and hailed a cab, which, for once, stopped.  
"We have to get to the hospital!" Mark yelled at the driver, putting Roger in the cab as gently as he could, "NOW!"  
On the ride there Mark held Roger's hand, and buried his head in Rogers hair, taking in the scent, letting his tears run free. Roger's breathing was shallow and uneven, but he was breathing nonetheless.  
"Your gonna be okay." Mark said, trying to convince both Roger and himself.

After what seemed like an eternity later they came to the local non-profit hospital. The same one Angel died in. Mark threw a twenty dollar bill- the last of his money- to the driver and carried Roger into the E.R.  
"We need help!" Mark yelled, not caring that everyone was staring at him, "Somebody! Please!"  
"Don't worry" said a doctor taking Roger away putting him on a bed with wheels, "We'll take care of him. Please take a seat." he said motioning towards a pathetic little waiting room, where several people sat.  
All Mark could think about was how empty he felt, when they took Roger out of his arms. He felt strangely light, but at the same time, weighted down. What was wrong with Roger? Why was he coughing up blood? Did he forget his AZT? Why didn't Mark remind him? And most importantly, will he ever see him again? All of these questions only entered his mind now, and they were too much to bare.  
"Are you okay, honey?" asked a nurse touching him on the shoulder, "Can I get you anything?"  
"I need to make a few calls." said Mark, his voice shaking. The nurse led him to a phone and Mark started dialing his friends numbers.

Collins:  
_"Hey, man, It's Collins, I'm not here right now and if you don't know what to do at the beep, you shouldn't be using a phone."_

Maureen:  
_"Hi! It's Maureen! I'm not here right now, but I'll get back to you, just leave you name, number and detailed physical description! Bye!"_

Joanne:  
_"Hello, this is Joanne Jefferson, leave your name, number and I'll get back to you."_

And finally, Mimi:  
_"Hey, it's Mimi! I'm not here, so, I'll call you back as soon as I can, bye-bye!"_

Mark left the same message:  
"Somethings happened to Roger, we're at the hospital. Get here as soon as you can."  
Strangely, Mark was almost relived no one was there. Maybe it was because he couldn't stand to see anyone else's face reflecting how he felt. Maybe it was because he needed room. Or maybe, he liked that when Roger got out, Mark would be the first face he saw.

For the next forty-five minutes, Mark sat wondering whether he would ever see Rogers face again. What would he do without him? Could Mark survive through this? He always knew that he would be one of the last of his friends to live because, everyone with the exception of Maureen and Joanne were positive for HIV and they weren't too close with Mark.  
The nurse who showed Mark the phone gently touched his shoulder, breaking his trance. Mark looked up.  
"Honey, your friend wants to see you." she said. Mark nodded and followed her into the room where he saw Roger. Roger was sick and pale looking. He was wearing a hospital gown and some sort of needle was in his arm.  
"The nurse said that you carried me in here," said Roger, "Not bad for a skinny little albino kid." he teased.  
"Roger, what are you doing here?" Mark asked  
"You brought me here, remember?"  
"You know what I'm talking about. Why did I have to bring you here? Why are you sick and why didn't you tell me?" Mark demanded. Roger sensed his anger and stopped smiling.  
"Because... I stopped taking my AZT." Roger admitted.  
"Why the hell would you do that?"  
"Because, it's going to stop working anyway. Mark, I'm going to die. I hate living knowing I'm going to suffer a slow painful death."  
"How long haven't you been taking your medicine?" Mark asked taking Rogers clammy hand.  
"A few weeks I guess."  
"Why didn't you tell me about this?"  
"I didn't want to scare you."  
"Mission accomplished." Mark retorted, "But, what about all you have to live for?"  
"Like what?" Roger snorted "Pain? Poverty?"  
"Like, Mimi! What about her?... What about me?"  
"With Mimi... it's complicated."  
"What?"  
"I... I don't think I love her. Don't get me wrong- she's a great person, and everything, but... I don't think she gets me. She just doesn't know when to leave me alone, when I need to just be by myself. Besides I think she likes Benny. She's been out a lot with him... And as for you, you can get along without me." Roger said squeezing Marks hand lightly.  
"No... no I can't. Roger, I hardly made it through Angels death... When you left for Santa Fe, a minute didn't go by where I didn't think about you.... Look I know this sounds really fucked up, but I think I-"  
"Excuse me? I'm sorry but visiting hours are over." said a nurse.  
"Okay." said Mark getting up embarrassed and frustrated.  
"Wait, Mark, what were you about to say?" asked Roger  
"Nothing. Forget I ever said anything. Do whatever you want. Live, die, it's your choice. Besides, it's not like you have anything to live for." Mark said, harshly. And he left Roger alone.  
"Do you want a few more minutes, honey?" the nurse asked after Mark closed the door.  
"No thanks."  
"If you want, you can stay here overnight." she offered. Mark thought for a moment.  
"That would be great, thanks." He couldn't leave Roger, no matter how mad he was at him.

The nurse showed him a little empty cot and kindly asked if there was anything he needed. Mark was grateful that the nurse was so kind to him but was too busy trying to sort out his emotions to really show it. The nurse seemed to understand and left Mark in the dark.

Hours went by and Mark couldn't sleep. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw Roger. Mark got up and absentmindedly looked for Rogers room. He opened a random door and sure enough, there was Roger, laying in peace, looking even more pale from the moonlight. Mark went over to his bed and gently touched his face.  
"Like I said, I know this is fucked up," Mark said to Roger who was unconscious, "But I think I'm in love with you... please don't die... I don't want to be alone."  
"I love you too." said Roger, turning his head.

"HOLY SHIT!! I thought you were sleeping!" said Mark  
"Surprise." said Roger, smiling. The two 'friends' looked at each-other for a long time, when Mark leaned over and kissed Roger on the lips. The sensation was better than either of them could of imagined. Roger put his hand on Marks face and Mark held Rogers head up as the kiss deepened. Any thoughts of anger, frustration or worry were left behind as they realized that this- this simple and pure love, was all they needed to get through any obstacle.

Neither of them heard the door open.

"I should lie on the verge of death more often." said Roger when they pulled away. They both laughed lightly as they soaked up this moment.

"Oh my god." said a voice from behind them. Mimi stood at the door looking shocked. Mark's head spun around in time to see her leave, angry and confused. Mostly confused.  
"She was bound to find out sometime." said Roger  
"...I should probably talk to her." said Mark.  
"Have fun. And come back soon." Mark kissed Roger one last time and went out to look for Mimi.

Mimi was in the waiting room, along with Benny, Maureen, Joanne, and Collins.  
"...and I walked in and they were _kissing_!" Mimi was explaining the scene  
"Oh, shit." Mark muttered under his breath.  
"Speak of the devil!" said Collins laughing. Suddenly the entire room was staring at Mark. Including the people who didn't know him.  
"Look, Mimi, I didn't plan... I didn't mean to... I mean, we've never...I didn't think that-"  
"It's okay, Mark." Mimi said, surprising Mark, "It's pretty fuckin weird, but, if that's what makes you guys happy..."  
"Not to mention, Mimi's going out with me anyway." Benny piped in. Mimi elbowed him in the stomach.  
"You were cheating on Roger?" Mark said, not sure whether to be relived or pissed. Relived seemed like a better option,  
"Well, at least it turned out for the better, right?" said Collins, "Congratulation, man!" he said draping an arm over my shoulder and giving me a one-armed hug.  
"Wow, Mark, congrats!" said Maureen. Joanne nodded and smiled. The nice nurse that helped Mark entered the room.  
"Excuse me sir, I just had a talk with Mr. Davis and he said that he hasn't been taking his AZT recently, but he also said that he'll remember to do so and he should be fine. We can release him this afternoon. We just want to make sure that he's okay and run a few more tests."  
"Great! Thanks so much!" said Mark, who hugged the nurse and thanked her for her troubles.

The rest of the day, the group of friends drifted in and out of Rogers room, leaving whenever he had to have another test because Maureen doesn't like needles. For one, everything was going right for Mark. Roger and Mimi broke up and neither of them were mad at each-other, everyone was in a good mood, Mark was finally in a relationship he knew would last with no doubts and best of all, Roger was going to live.

At about three o'clock in the afternoon, Mark, Mimi, Benny, Joanne, and Maureen were sitting in the waiting room, waiting for Roger to come out so they could go home. Mark was just standing around when someone picked him up and put him over his shoulder.  
"Roger! What the hell?" Mark said, laughing, holding on to his glasses so they wouldn't fall.  
"I'm returning the favor. I'm carrying you home so we can get ready for our first date." Roger said walking out the door. Mark could hear the laughs of his friends and probably anyone else watching.  
"Roger I'm really not comfortable with-"  
"Okay then, bridal style." said Roger, swinging Mark around like a rag doll and holding him as if they were newly weds. Roger exited the hospital as if he didn't just escape from death and he didn't have his new boyfriend in his arms. A man passing them, looking confused and Roger said, "Back off, he's mine."  
"Roger, your lucky your cute, cause your so fucking weird."  
"But you still love me, right?"  
"Yep."  
"I love you too.


End file.
